You are not setting up a monitoring platform. You are turning on a set of alerts somebody already thought through, and getting a message when one of them matters.
One call turns all nine on. This is the free plan, not an upsell.
Fires on a single bad password, the first sign of someone working through a credential list.
More than ten in ten minutes is not a typo, it is an attack in progress.
Account takeovers start with a reset on an address that is not theirs.
Sign-ins from somewhere unrecognised, and anyone quietly being given admin.
Errors climbing usually means a bad deploy. Ten signups in ten minutes means a bot.
A pile of blocked or unauthorized requests means somebody is looking for a door.
Getting told is easy. Being told well is the hard part, and it is most of the work here.
Every alert carries a plain-language note on what the pattern usually means and what to change. No jargon, no wiki links you will not read at 3am.
One tap, no login, works on a phone. Link scanners cannot resolve it by accident, and incidents auto-close once things go quiet.
The first alert sends now. Repeats inside the window are counted and folded into the next as "+42 more." A burst can never mail-bomb you.
Your app pings us on a schedule. If the pings stop, we alert you. The one failure an event tool cannot otherwise see.
Put someone on overnight and someone on weekends. An uncovered hour alerts everyone, so a schedule mistake never turns into silence.
Flip it on and your users get a status URL that reflects real incidents, not a page you remember to update.
Everything here is available over MCP, so setup is a conversation, not a settings tour.
Create projects, turn on packs, write custom alerts, add channels, set the rota, search events, investigate an incident. Whatever the dashboard can do, your agent can do by talking.
Your project page hands you one paste. Your agent reads it, adds the fire-and-forget calls in the right places, and sends a test so you see it work.
"What happened an hour ago?" pulls the incident, the events around it, and the suggested fix, without you opening a dashboard.